Michael: What's so fucking funny?
Harold: Life. Life's a goddamn laugh riot.
Harold: Who is she? Who was she? Who does she hope to be?
Michael: What is he - a psychiatrist or a hairdresser?
Donald: Actually he's both. He shrinks my head and then combs me out.
Donald: Thanks to the silver screen your neurosis has got style.
Michael: Believe it or not, there was a time in my life when I didn't go around announcing I was a faggot.
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